arts-junkie's Blurbs

About Me:

Kevin. | 24 | MA | cis male | ENFJ | Aries

Bookworm, writer, musician, dirty liberal, cultural enthusaist, progressive social activist, deadpan humorist. I run on coffee and sarcasm.

I'm not really a "fandom" person, although I have many interests. I reblog things that I find funny, smart, beautiful, or interesting.

Aesthetics are what I live for. I recognize beauty in everything, from the mundane to the sublime. I also consider myself an artist, because I love nothing more than to create. My sense of humor is dry, deadpan, and relies heavily on irony. Being physically active is important to me. I love to wander and explore and try new things. I can be very bitter and cynical at times, but I’m probably the biggest optimist I know. I value genuineness above all other qualities in others. I love long conversations with people I know, but also with complete strangers. It is immensely gratifying to hear other people’s stories. I certainly hope you’ll share yours with me.

If you wanna know more, shoot me a message. I'm an open book, and I love to listen. If you need a friend, I'm here for you.

Have a sparkling day!

arts-junkie's Posts

Oct 20 2014 8:46 pm

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On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. 

I have a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill. 

Me: ‘Hi, I’d like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.’ Server: ‘That’ll be $1.04. Eat in?’ 
Me: ‘No, it’s to go.’ At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny. 
Server: ‘Uh, hang on a sec, I’ll be right back.’ He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot.

The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server: ‘Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?’ 
Manager: ‘No. A what?’ 
Server: ‘A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me…’ 
Manager: ‘Ask for something else. There’s no such thing as a $2 bill.’ 
Server: ‘Yeah, thought so.’ 

He comes back to me and says, ‘We don’t take these.

Do you have anything else?’ 

Me: ‘Just this fifty. You don’t take $2 bills? Why? 
Server: ‘I don’t know.’ 
Me: ‘See here where it says legal tender?’ 
Server: ‘Yeah.’ 
Me: ‘So, why won’t you take it?’ 
Server: ‘Well, hang on a sec.’ 

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I’m a shoplifter, and says to him, ‘He says I have to take it.’

Manager: ‘Doesn’t he have anything else?’ 
Server: ‘Yeah, a fifty. I’ll get it and you can open the safe and get change. 
Manager: ‘I’m not opening the safe with him in here.’ 
Server: ‘What should I do?’ 
Manager: ‘Tell him to come back later when he has real money.’ 
Server: ‘I can’t tell him that! You tell him.’ 
Manager: ‘Just tell him.’ 
Server: ‘No way! This is weird. I’m going in back. 

The manager approaches me and says, ‘I’m sorry, but we don’t take big bills this time of night.’

Me: ‘It’s only seven o’clock! Well then, here’s a two dollar bill.’ 
Manager: ‘We don’t take those, either.’ 
Me: ‘Why not?’ 
Manager: ‘I think you know why.’ 
Me: ‘No really, tell me why.’ 
Manager ‘Please leave before I call mall security.’ 
Me: ‘Excuse me?’ 
Manager: ‘Please leave before I call mall security.’ 
Me: ‘What on earth for?’ 
Manager: ‘Please, sir..’ 
Me: ‘Uh, go ahead, call them.’ 
Manager: ‘Would you please just leave?’ 
Me: ‘No.’ 
Manager: ‘Fine — have it your way then.’ 
Me: ‘Hey, that’s Burger King, isn’t it?’ 

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.

A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in. 

Guard: ‘Yeah, Mike, what’s up?’ 
Manager (whispering): ‘This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.’ 
Guard: ‘No kidding! What?’ 
Manager: ‘Get this. A two dollar bill.’ 
Guard (incredulous): ‘Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?’ 
Manager: ‘I don’t know. He’s kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.’ 
Guard: ‘Oh, so the fifty’s fake!’ 
Manager: ‘No, the two dollar bill is.’ 
Guard: ‘Why would he fake a two dollar bill?’ 
Manager : ‘I don’t know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?’ 
Guard: ‘Yeah.’

Security Guard walks over to me and……

Guard: ‘Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you’re trying to use.’ 
Me: ‘Uh, no.’ 
Guard: ‘Lemme see ‘em.’ 
Me: ‘Why?’ 
Guard: ‘Do you want me to get the cops in here?’ 

At this point I’m ready to say, ‘Sure, please!’ but I want to eat, so I say, ‘I’m just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill. I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I’m taking a swing at him. He takes the bill turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says, 

Guard: ‘Hey, Mike, what’s wrong with this bill?’ 
Manager: ‘It’s fake.’ 
Guard: ‘It doesn’t look fake to me.’ 
Manager: ‘But it’s a two dollar bill.’ 
Guard: ‘Yeah? ‘ 
Manager: ‘Well, there’s no such thing, is there?’ 

The security guard and I both look at him like he’s an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue and is an idiot. So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. 

(via teamrocketcutie)

Oct 20 2014 8:44 pm

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Gaga’s 2011 ‘Marry The Night’ MTV EMA performance was voted Best EMA Moment with 1,116,015 votes.

(Source: gagasgallery, via blondambitiontour)

Oct 20 2014 8:44 pm

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SpongeBob, where’s my order?


Did you look under the tray?


Oh. No I didn’t, sorry.



(via josephinef)

Oct 20 2014 8:44 pm

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how i passed college tbh

(via josephinef)

Oct 20 2014 8:44 pm

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Oct 20 2014 8:44 pm

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(Source: pas2blaze, via josephinef)

Oct 20 2014 8:43 pm

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(via exactable)

Oct 20 2014 8:42 pm

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when someone tells me to calm down when i’m talking about things i’m passionate about



(via heroofthemachine)

Oct 20 2014 8:42 pm

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(Source: dietcrush, via ruinedchildhood)

Oct 20 2014 8:41 pm

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Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I had discovered sports and beer in high school instead of shitty white boy existentialism and “weird” music


(via lilmissloverr)

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